After the event of yesterday, today I started reading one of the books that I had placed in a wishlist to buy this month. The book, "Unfuck Yourself: How to Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Life" by Gary John Bishop, is something that as you have read is something that I should be striving to do. Easier said than done, but life isn't easy.
I stopped reading to write this because the last chapter that I read, "I am wired to win" actually made a lot of sense. The basic concept is that the brain is hardwired to always win. It doesn't matter what it is winning at it, it will always win. this means that if it is wired in your head that you can't have a successful relationship, your brain will make sure that it wins at accomplishing that.
It's little messed up to think about it, but it does make sense. When you're good at something, whether it is a good thing or a bad thing to you personally, the mind will make sure that you accomplish it. You may not like it, but it's what the brain knows how to do, so it's going to do it.
It begs the question of how do you make your brain lose, especially when it's been doing it for so long? The answer isn't easy. The book goes over things to think about, but in the end it is just a book with suggestions.
The thing that I've been struggling with is the thing that my brain is the best at winning at. It always does the same things each time. It's hard wired to make sure that things play out the same in the end. This time it looks like it won a little too hard, but in the end it has won.
But in the end, I'm tired of my brain winning. It's hard to beat something that is undefeated. Like the best sports teams in the world, they are just always one step ahead of everything else. It does whatever it has to do to win.
But like every great team, they do lose after awhile. Nothing can stay undefeated forever. Times change and other things rise. It's a little harder when that thing you have to defeat is yourself. But when your brain is acting like the Patriots, it has to be defeated. It has to be overcome. It has to lose.
What will I do to make it lose? I'm not sure yet. I have to make it through Monday first. My mind will have to deal with whatever comes. But whatever comes, will come and that will be that. In the end, there is only one thing that in this world that I can control. Myself.
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